in one year

sometimes it takes a moment, sometimes a lifetime but a lot can happen in a year.

Nov. 2008 (wow that long ago) im over joyed, speechless, teary eyed, giddy, nervous, anxious, excited, amazed, & pregnant.

such a surreal feeling, like no other feeling one can feel. There's a tiny little person growing inside of me? Craziness!

{fastforward 9mos}

My stomach hurt around 1am on July 22nd, 2009, id go to the bathroom for a bit, but nothing helped. I remember sitting in bed with a notepad and noting every ache and pain

1:13
1:16
1:20
1:22

I just kept remembering the doctors said if they are 5 min apart then come in, so for an hour, while Jon was passed out next to me, I kept writing

1:34
1:36
1:39

eventually I figured something is going on, or at least I hoped it was. I was 38 & 1/2 weeks pregnant and ready to meet baby Lucy Monroe.

I called the Ob around 2:15am thinking they would say it was just a tummy ache, and bracing myself for the embarrassment, Dr. Whitted called me back and said to go ahead and come in. I couldn't believe it, I almost felt dishonest with him, like I knew it wasn't labor but I wanted it to be.

around 2:45 we make our way to the hospital, bag were already packed, house was spotless, fridge full of yummy stuff, here we go. During the ride as I bumped up and down, swerved from side to side, the 15 min ride to the hospital seemed endless as the pain got a tad bit more intense, but still I wasn't sure what was going on at that point. I just knew I would be returning home shortly.

We got there, signed in, the pain was worse causing me to stop talking until it subsided. I wobbled over to our temporary room, I had a wardrobe change and was all hooked up to the monitors. The nurse came to give me an IV and at that point I was "handling" the pain.

3:50am I am laying in the hospital bed, hooked up to a million things (more like 3) managing the pain I was in and praying I was going to be admitted soon. I was checked and was 1 & 1/2 cm (yes and a half!) I felt like I was in that temp room forever, I even figured out how to unplug myself so that I could use the bathroom without having to call the nurse (which was every 5 mins) this part of Labor was not pretty!

6:30am I was checked to see my progress and FINALLY I was 3 cm (haha) and my pain level seemed that it couldn't get any worse than it was. I had already requested an Epidural over and over. Somehow I managed to move from the temporary room to my "birthing" room, the bed was bigger so I was happy :) the hooked me back up in between contractions and gave me some medicine to help with my nausea (oh yes, labor pains, upset stomach and throwing up, the joys people, o the joys!) that medicine pretty much knocked me out, I remember getting woken up a few times, one being for an Epidural sent from Jesus!!!

**side story**
So here I am prepped for my Epidural (sitting on the side of the bed, bent over a table with my nakey butt showing) here comes the Dr. that is going to be my best friend in a few seconds. FIRST words out of his mouth, "Hi, don't I know you?" oh yes folks, we went to church together, I wish I would have said, Hi nice to see you, have you met my butt yet? oh it was sooooo embarrassing! anyways back to the story...

I got the Epidural (felt none of it) and then went back to sleep :) to only be woken up by the doctor saying alright Holly its time to push. I was so confused, I asked what about my water? He said we just broke it (oh really? and where was I) Then I remember saying are you serious? over and over, I was so happy and awake and excited to do this. I was laughing and looking at everyone else excitement in the room. U just couldn't believe it was about to happen. I had watched "A Baby Story" so many times I was ready for this part.

My sister was to my right and Jon was on my left and my mom was standing around my head everything was so surreal, almost slow motion, I was in a lot of pain, my back felt like it was braking but I was giving it everything I had. Finally I had to have "assistance" with "scissors" if you know what I mean, and poor Jon didn't see it coming. Im sure he still has nightmares from it. After my "assistance" It only took 2 pushes to get her in my arms.

1

Every got louder and louder, shes almost here, u got it Holly, oh my gosh, push

2

It was 3:38pm & with everyone around with a tear in their eye, Lucy Monroe Hill was laid on my chest, I ran my hand from her head to her toes, with tears running down my face and my nose all scrunched up, My heart became more than just an organ in my body, She became my heart. She was the reason I lived. I never knew what beauty meant until I saw her little face, looking up at me with bright eyes and a pink face.

They took her away to get her measurements and to clean her off for me, I was so proud. Nobody could wipe my smile away, it had to have been the best day of my life.

Over walks Jon with a little white bundle of blankets and a proud papa bear look on his face, he sat down with her in the chair next to me and examined every part he could see, she looked just like him, it made me cry. Then he handed her to me. I held her so I could see her face, she had one hand out of the blankets and in her mouth, I slipped my finger in her hand and she squeezed it tightly. I said "Hi baby, its momma!" "you are so pretty" and I just looked at her for what seemed like forever.

My sister came over to me and asked me if I wanted to nurse her, something I couldn't wait to try out, so I said yea looking over to the nurse to make sure it was ok, she nodded yes so I looked backed to Heather waiting for my instructions. Lucy was a champ, she knew what to do. I was a breastfeeding mother from the start. She looked up at me the whole time she munched away. It was the sweetest thing, actually gave me little butterflies in my tummy. We stayed like that for 30ish mins until she seemed to doze off. They finally took her from me to take her to the nursery. I was ready to move to my final room there at the hospital too so the quicker they took her the quicker I got her back.

My noodle legs along with my not pregnant body made its way to the 4th floor to settle into my new room. So many faces were waiting to see me (well really Lucy) and after I was in the bed in walked my visitors. They all talked about how they saw her through the window in the nursery, and how beautiful she was. I knew it was true and I couldn't wait to get her back

Somewhere in the 7 o clock hour, In rolled a tiny little cart with my most prized possession, she was all wrapped up in blankets, with a hat on her head. I looked a hot mess but did not care one bit. My mom, dad & sister were there along with Jon, his mom, dad, and brother. All waiting to hold her for the first time.

Once everyone left (which I loved showing her off) we settled into what would be the rest of our lives. Breastfeeding was going amazingly, Jon was awesome with her, and I was beside myself. my family was perfect!

My beautiful daughter was healthy, happy and loved by many.

sometimes it takes a moment, a moment to realize your life has changed.


sometimes a lifetime, which I get to share with the ones I love.

a lot can happen in a year, in 6 days that tiny little baby girl, who captured my heart so quickly on July 22nd 2009 @ 3:38pm, will be a year old.

I have quickly experienced every milestone, every smile, laugh, first food, sickness, joy. Sometimes I find myself mourning the loss of her infancy but I look forward to celebrating her life and whats to come.

Lucy Monroe, you have changed my world. There are NO words that could ever express my love for you. The crazy part is that there is a God who loves you more. (even if it seems impossible to me) You are more than anyone could ask for. I pray that my days with you are long ones, full of laughter and joy. Life lessons learned and the good times rejoiced. You are my heart, you are what keeps me alive. I love you more than what seems possible.

6 days

My little baby girl will be 1, something I once dreaded, but now I cant wait.
She already gave me the best year of my life
I can't wait for the next one. It can only get better.



thanks for reading :)